Since Monday, I’ve been on an all veggie, no meat, no smoking, no alcohol diet. I do this cleanse annually and, with Summer time just around the mountains, I figure now is a good time to start putting away the Winter belly and signing myself up for personal fat boy camp. These past few days I’ve been dreaming about burritos being thrown at me, donuts with pulled pork filling, sandwiches that use two turkey legs instead of bread, etc. etc. The extra energy, comfortable sleep and non-bloating feeling after every meal far outweighs these detox fever dreams so giving up my favorite past time of devouring dead animal flesh is much easier to cope with.
The tofu salad shown above is mostly what this diet consists of. That and an like 45 thousand elephant tusks worth of water. All you gotta do is cut up some tofu until it looks like big city skyline, fry tofu cubes and mushroom in sesame seed oil, sprinkle with pepper and garlic powder and top with cheapo .99 cent bags of salad.
2 Chainz!!! Looks as if the homey Waka Flocka could use a couple rounds of tofu salad himself. He just got lucky J-Cole didn’t go S.W.A.T. team like he did Common at the end of the NBA All-Star game.