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Pop Your Collard Greens

December 29th, 2009 · 10 Comments

Ingrediants

-Collard greens
-Tilapia fillets
-Ginger
-Salt and pepper (to taste)

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I’ve been on a health trip lately. Most likely because the holidays have thrown my eating habits off quite a bit and I’m feeling kind of sluggish. More so because I just turned 27 years old a couple weeks back and I figure it’s time to get back into the healthy man I once was. Or I once set out to be. Or I once saw in the mirror that one time in high school when I had abs.

This is a very easy recipe that takes little preparation and even littler (if that’s a word) effort on behalf of the chef. It’s like Dikembe Mutumbo dunking the ball. This meal is 100% healthy and very low in fat.

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First, you’re gonna wash your collard greens.

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But first, before the first, wash your damn dishes.

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Wash.

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I store my ginger in the freezer. It keeps longer and it doesn’t lose taste. Cut two half inch pieces of ginger off the root. We’re going to use these ginger snaps (yeah that’s right, I said “snaps”) to steam flavor the collard greens.

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Now fill your pot about a quarter of the way with water. You don’t want to fill it up too much cause you’re going to want to steam the collard greens as much as you can. If you fill it up too much then you’re basically boiling the greens and they’ll lose taste.

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Sprinkle on your salt and peppa (now push it real good). Turn your heat up to high. Once the water starts boiling turn down the volume knob on your temperature to about medium-low, cover and let your greens cook for about 20-30 minutes or until they turn dark green. The ginger will seep into the collard greens while it’s cooking while covered.

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Mmmmmmm dark green like horse poo poo. I mean, like healthy horse poo poo. I mean, not like poo poo at all. Mmmmmmm.

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Now, you shouldn’t have much water in your pot, but if you do drain out enough that the water level is sitting on the bottom of the greens. We do this because we don’t want to boil the tilapia fillets. We want to steam cook them as much as possible so the fish can take in as much collard green and ginger flavor. If the fillets boil in too much water, the water will take away from the flavor when you eventually drain the water. That will make the fish taste bland.

Once your water level is correct, lay two tilapia fillet on top of the greens. Keep the temperature at medium-low heat and cover. Let the tilapia cook until it forms slits (AKA flakey) like the picture below.collard%20greens%20fish11%20copy Pop Your Collard Greens

As soon as your fish is ready, drain the water out the pot and now it’s time to get your grub on!

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Even better with hot sauce!

Want more recipes? Check out our curry recipes.

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10 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Megan // Dec 29, 2009 at 5:56 pm

    I heart fish + collards :grin: (in my case, catfish & collards, good Southern child that I am :wink: )

    “More so because I just turned 27 years old a couple weeks back and I figure it’s time to get back into the healthy man I once was. Or I once set out to be. Or I once saw in the mirror that one time in high school when I had abs”

    I hear that. My reunion is next year. :shock:

  • 2 Caleb // Dec 29, 2009 at 10:50 pm

    Since you’re from the south collard greens are probably more common. But out west they really aren’t. So when people talk about collard greens they usually say “colored greens” or “collar greens”.

    One thing a married man should never do: Don’t get lipstick on your collar greens.

  • 3 Hannah // Jun 2, 2010 at 5:22 pm

    just wanted to say that I so enjoyed stumbling upon (not literally, of course) your recipes - great, simple tips for healthy cooking, but most of all, you’re pretty damn funny! Ever consider writing a cookbook?? :)

  • 4 Caleb // Jun 9, 2010 at 2:09 pm

    Hi Hannah!! Thx for stopping by my lil ‘ol site. Cookbook? Hmmmmm, that was never on my bucketlist, but that could be a possbility. However, I made a promise to myself as a little kid that if I were to ever write a book it will be have to be written in an imaginary language.

    Do you think it’s a good idea? Would you buy it? Can I borrow $5?

  • 5 Kayla // Jun 21, 2010 at 3:38 am

    Lol…I would buy it…and p.s. Anything can happen. Have you seen coolio’s cookbook? WTF…yes anything. Oh my.
    Keep the recipes coming! I enjoy experimenting with them ; ) flaming hot cheeto chicken is my fave w/ bleu cheese dressing…yum

  • 6 Megan // Jun 22, 2010 at 12:22 am

    If you make a cookbook, I will pimp it to everyone I know :cool:

  • 7 Caleb // Jun 22, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    Kayla - I haven’t seen his cookbook, but I did watch some youtube video of him he did for a cooking channel. The cooking channel part wasn’t odd, but the fact that he was in a goldfish costume while his friend was in a shrimp costume was pretty weird. Here’s the link:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFiZPxTt2rM

    Megan - Hmmmmm, now I’m really thinking about this cookbook thing. I wouldn’t even know where to start.

  • 8 Megan // Jun 22, 2010 at 5:45 pm

    I would start with something like this:
    http://www.morriscookbooks.com/order/order_form.asp

    Most of those cookbook publishers will send you either a free information kit or a full sized sample of their cookbooks, to give you an idea of what yours could look like. They’re good companies to go to, since they publish based on how many you’ll likely need to sell.

  • 9 kayla // Jun 23, 2010 at 1:28 pm

    Wow….I checked out the link…now I know anything can happen for sure! Lmao! I didn’t want to watch but I couldn’t look away. Why don’t I have a cooking show? And if I did I’m pretty sure I couldn’t talk about kneading @ssh*les and titties….my mind is officially blown :neutral:

  • 10 Paula // Jul 21, 2010 at 2:11 am

    mmm that must be so delicious!

    have a nice day!
    Paula

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