After watching a great rock show courtesy of my buddies Def Zero I decided to take my sleep medicine below: carne sada fries. Oh, the agony of eating bad. It hurts so good!

Deaf Zero doing their thizzle.

You see how Barack is making changes already. Just last week these two were arguing about some suspense/thriller movie. I wasn’t really paying attention, but I think the movie was called Affirmative Action or something like that. Now, Tory and Cody are having a jolly good time like Leonardo DiCaprio and the girl that got booty butt naked on the couch in Titanic partying with the peasants below deck. Yeah I watched Titanic and I cried twice. First when the ship was sinking and then again 3 years later when I realized that their wasn’t going to be a sequal. Bad times.

Just like my Mama told me: “Caleb, you go out there and make new friends. Don’t let them make fun of your leg braces, slanted eyes, and suspiciously small forearms.” Thus, why I love meeting new people and why I am always 10 minutes late to work. Good times!

So, back to the question. What did you eat last night??

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If y’all don’t know what Adsense is here’s a little breakdown. Adsense is a type of ad program that generates ads on this site by scanning the context and generating ads using the words in the site’s context to come up with related ads. Everytime an ad is clicked I am thrown a couple cents. Believe it or not, some people make a living off of their Adsense earnings.

Now, I must have typed in the words “gay” and “ghetto” at some point in this site’s life because about a month ago the above circled ad was generated. I don’t any negative notions against the gays. In fact, I am jealous of the gays because they double their wardrobe everytime they get a new boyfriend. But it must be hard being gay. I mean, how do they figure out who’s the big spoon when they’re spooning in bed??? I mean, naturally the male is the big spoon, but if their are two guys in the bed and two bigs spoons…ahhhhhhh all these questions about the gays.

 If you are a gay please…intrigue me with your answers.

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I’m not going to act like I’m smart by Googling “Why do I get sleepy after a meal?” and then reiterate the search results. By the way, isn’t it going to be so sad in like 10 years when Google is basically raising your kids and running your life. You literally Googled “How to change a diaper” and “How to play catch with your borderline gay son to prevent him from crossing all the way over to the other team”. WAKE UP PEOPLE! Okay, sorry for that rant. 

***Note to self: write an article about how sad our society is because people now a days can’t think for themselves and run to the Google everytime they don’t know anything***

Okay, let’s get down like James Brown (not like his cousin James Beige who spent all his years trying to find a cure for bitch-ass-ness). These are my real deal Holyfield thoughts on why people, such as myself, get sleepy after lunch (especially at work). So, feel free to chime in with your answers. And please, no Googling…a monkey can Google anything and you’re not a monkey are you? You are a lion at heart and you also have the red ass of one of those chimps with the red ass. Ahhhh, you see what I did there? I created me a nice little joke. I’ll put that in my pocket and save that for another occasion.

I think that after a meal the blood from organs and muscles are diverted to the stomach so it can digest the food you just ate. Thus, why you feel so relaxed after eating and why you feel sleepy.

I also know that sugar levels play a part in a person feeling exhausted. Like how diabetics feel faint when their blood sugars are low. I learned from somewhere or someone (I forget where or who) that when certain foods get broken down in your body they turn into sugar. When you have sugar in your system you eventually have the mystical “sugar crash”. Some sugars are worse than others and will lead to an even larger sugar crash. Refined sugars (such as sugars in most sodas and beverages you find at your local liquor store) are the bad sugars. These are sugars that do not naturally occur in nature and even though they give you a boost of energy, they will eventually make you tired. Natural sugars, such as those found in apples and other fruits are best if you’re looking for an energy boost and no sugar crash. Sugars are energy, but it’s the type of energy you put in your body that determines how you feel. Put it like this: There are various types of fuels you can put in your car, but what type of gas will burn cleaner and ultimately keep your car running in tip top shape? Also, remember this: It’s not gay until it goes in.

So, what are your thoughts on why people get so sleepy after a nice meal?

These might as well be Tylenol PMs.

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