Hodad’s
5010 Newport Ave
San Diego, CA 92107
(619) 224-4623

If you’re not familiar with Ocean Beach, let me give you a quick rundown. Well, I’m not known for my rundown quickness’s so let me just give you a rundown at normal speed. Ocean Beach (commonly known as O.B. to San Diegans) is the Haight-Ashbury of Southern California. From its gift shops that sell 8-way tobacco pipes (ummm, yeah tobacco pipes…suuure) to its welcoming sidewalks that attract many run a way youths to its annual Fourth of July marshmallow fight to the Jazzman that plays his sax on famous Newport Avenue to the renown Ocean Beach International Hostel that houses backpackers from around the globe to the homeless population that still manage to keep great humility to Gallagher’s Irish Pub that showcases San Diego’s local Hip Hop scene every Wednesday night to its concrete pier that stretches 1900 feet out to sea - Ocean Beach is very hang loose. 

The soil that allows this kind of vibe to bloom is that O.B. has not let gentrification rear its ugly face into the business community. My estimate would be that 90% of the businesses in O.B. are NOT franchise companies. Most of the businesses in the area are operated by the owners. The majority of these owners are young (or young at heart), so run their operations with a “good times, good people and good product first; money second” attitude. This warm “mom and pop” sense of business spawns a community of warm welcoming people. Think about it. The vibe of any town starts with its business community. If a business community is ran by people that are youthful, inviting, creative and always ready to have a good time then of course the community surrounding it will follow suit. Thus, the main reason why O.B.’s vibe exists. There are not many places in San Diego where you can walk down the street and wave hello to a stranger as y’all pass each other on the sidewalk. When I go into O.B. I wave so much I feel like I’m at a World Series game. 

All that ying-yang I just typed does lead to a point. Oh yes it does! A golden example of how boss O.B. is, is a little place called Hodad’s – it’s okay to fall in love with this hoe. I guarantee your mom will like her. 

Honestly, a hamburger is a hamburger. You might find one that is slightly worse or slightly better than the last one you ate, but in reality, a hamburger will be in the immediate “taste good” range as the previous one. It’s meat and some veggies between bread – burgers are not “wow” material. Kinda like a Jennifer Aniston movie. It’s not so important that I’ll break an appointment for it, but if I happen to run by one then I’ll watch it. So, how do you make a hamburger stand out? You don’t. You make everything around the hamburger stand out. How do you make a Jennifer Aniston movie stand out? Give her 10 million dollars so she can let her left boob slip out of the tube top for three seconds. It’s simple.

Case in point: The trippy environment, the excellent customer service, and overall vibe of Hodad’s. And the occasional boob slippage of a drunk customer. Hey, it happens and when it happens my Sony camera happens and then my online boob slippage website happens to get more hits and then I happen to get rich and then an angry husband happens to find me on the street and then I happen to wake up in the hospital with a facial fracture. But more about that later.

I’m not saying the burgers at Hodad’s aren’t good. They are great. They are excellent. I would have make love with one of the burgers right now if it spoke to me in Spanish and called me papi chulo. The thing about Hodad’s is the venue and staff definitely outshine the food - and that is a GREAT thing! Any place that serves beers in jars is cool in my book. And trust me, my book doesn’t get many new entries. Not that my book is some special book. It’s actually a notebook that I stole off some school kid after I stole his bike. Oh, how I miss the year 2003.

I mean, you can have your beers in jars and be happy like normal people or you can go to the ritzy downtown restaurant and have some random waiter dude that looks like the Monopoly guy ask you, “Sir, would you care for another splash of champagne” and then you respond with, “What do you think, peasant?” and then you roll off in your Rolls Royce and then have sex with the escort you hired because you don’t have enough game to pick up a woman the old fashion way and then you cry in front of your fire place sipping on some brandy trying to come to terms that Obama is in fact president and has a mean hook shot.

Bro, just go to Hodad’s, eat some great food, and then nail some fat chicks like us normal people. Everything will be fine. Leave the high class restaurants to the cyborgs of society.

Walking into Hodad’s is like walking into somebody else’s acid trip. New, vintage, and quirky license plates take over the wall while the “eye in the sky” mural on the ceiling reminds you to brush your teeth three times a day. There’s so much random stuff on the wall that  you often find patrons doing the Ray Charles head movement thing rather than doing the eat-your-darn-food-thing. If you’re lucky enough, the mini VW van table will be available to you and your homey-lover-friend. Even better, you can sit on the stools that sit you right in front of the large, open window so you can watch the craziness of O.B. go by.

I swear the employees at Hodad’s were forced to swallow a vile of an exotic flu and the owners are the only ones that have the antidote. That’s the only reason why the employees at Hodad’s could be so good at their job. They need that antidote. Not only, are they well trained in the art of customer service, but they are well versed in the school of cool. Looking past the piercings and the tats, Hodad’s staff are great conversationalists. If I were a betting man I would say that the male employees do pretty well with the young starlets and the female employees have had many numbers slipped to them via receipts.

In conclusion, Hodad’s is a must whenever you’re in San Diego. O.B. is a must when you’re in San Diego. San Diego is a must when you’re in California. The United States is a must of you’re on the planet Earth. Earth is a must of you decide to stop on into the Milky Way Galaxy.

So catch some waves and a babe at Hodad’s located at:

5010 Newport Avenue
San Diego, CA 92107
www.hodadies.com

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