Attention People Who Eat A Home Breakfast Everyday: Where Are You At....Really.

Attention People Who Eat A Home Breakfast Everyday: Where Are You At….Really.

August 26th, 2008 · 1 Comment

familybreakfast Attention People Who Eat A Home Breakfast Everyday: Where Are You At....Really.

Quick question: Who really eats a daily breakfast like the happy family to the left?

Please speak up. I am by no means a stupid person, however, I can’t figure out a logical answer to this question. On the same token, I’m not Einstein nor do I know how to flip a DeLorean in a way where I can go forward to visit my future self, but when I first asked myself this question I thought I could come up with a simple answer. 35 hours and beers later; I’m answerless. The only logical reason the man in the picture can whip up a dish like this on a daily basis is (A) he’s been smoking crack all night and cooking breakfast is just a part of his trip, (B) he’s cheating on his wife and guilt has driven him to become heavyweight champion of the breakfast world, or (C) he is not the dad of the family. In fact, he is a time traveling cyborg designed to warn the world that armageddon will come in the form of evil uprising gay nano robots. Sadly, this cyborg took the wrong bus and ended up being enslaved and reprogrammed into a butler. Poor cyborg butler….I feel for your struggle man. Fight the power!

Personally, I haven’t had a sit down breakfast of this picture’s calibur since……(I’m thinking)….well, put it like this: my mustache hadn’t arrived on my face yet. The hussle and bussle of the morning does not allow me (as well as most of us) to free up 2 morning hours to cook up such a feast. My breakfast is usually eaten at 1pm and is something most of us would call lunch. Sometimes, when I remember, I’ll grab a granola bar from the cabinet and eat it while I’m chillin’ in traffic. That’s as far as my breakfast goes. Shoot, I can’t even remember the last time I ate cereal and had enough time to solve the maze on the back of the Trix box. Oh, the dice of life has crapped out on me many times. Don’t feel sorry for me though…as a bachelor, I can eat dinner in my boxers. I’d say not having a Brady Bunch breakfast is a fair trade.

So, TV show breakfast eaters of the world, PLEASE RAISE YOUR HANDS! I want to pick your brain…and pick up your leftovers every morning…..PLEASE!

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